I hope your not the first in line

You don’t want to go to the ER in general. You don’t want to be here. But somehow you ended up here.

There are a bunch of people in the waiting room. All waiting for help. I’m just the one sitting off to the side.

An elderly lady checks in and sits in the waiting room chair. And within five minutes she’s taken back. And sadly I know a lot abii ok it that.

I almost feel guilty that I’m so glad I’m not the first in line. I’m glad I’m just here for something simple. Here for something fast. I’m so glad they know how to act so fast.

When your the first in line. In the er it doesn’t mean they like you more. It’s not a privilege to go that fast. It’s a burden and a scary act.

It means your not doing good. That somethings really wrong it means that you need help bad. Right now. I’m not the first in line because I’m not doing bad.

I’ve been brought into the ER like that. I’ve seen them work real fast. I’ve been scared and quiet. Praying for this to be all right.

So go that little old lady I pray whoever brought you is fixed or at least they help you some how.

You might never get better or maybe it’s not like that. I just hope you don’t feel bad. That you went back before everyone else has.

And to the other people the one who has been mean. The ones who see this and almost show jealous I hope they find out why they should be glad. That they aren’t the first in line.

Shayweasel is glad to not be first

The Way Of The Left…

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The road isn’t easy when the road was never really paved.. I personally never walked there on that road… Its not that I didn’t want to walk there it’s just that I walked in the way of the left..

The way of the left wasn’t well. Right so therefore no one knew how to take it..

The road you my papa, have had to take has never been easy, from broken bones to hurt legs to hurt hearts to hurt arms.. You stood weak and strong. Your brain works in the way of the left but you wanted to be in the way of the right.. So you walked in the way of the right you tried to be the same as what you saw something I never did.

You stood up and spoke when needed to and held your breath when things happen and when we begged you to breath you breathed in deep. And when your soul begin to wonder we didn’t even blink because papa we know you. You make living look beautifully you make things understandable. You don’t always speak from the heart but always with your heart. You hold dear how you see things..

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You have struggled so hard in the way of the right your walking lately has been tough since the doctors told you that your body is failing you, but my papa please don’t fail your body you’re stronger then that.. .But the way of the right has been so hard on you. Telling you that your emotions are silly or unacceptable..

Papa… I have an offer to make you… And I promise you that this offer is once in a lifetime… WIll you come over… To the way of the left? Will you come and start seeing things like me? And will you accepted that papa the way of the right maybe isn’t perfectly fit for you..

Maybe if you come to the left you can start standing up for the way of the left people to the way of the right people? Maybe you could give a point of view people haven’t seen.. Maybe just maybe you could show people that there emotions are as acceptable as can be… Maybe you could come over and see like me..

Because papa when I see you.. I don’t see a man who doesn’t fit in or a man who is sick no.. I see a strong warrior who loves music and can read a book in a day, I see a strong pastor who can explain the bible in ways I’ve never seen and I mean that in a fantastic way. I see a man who is an amazingly fantastic papa and an amazingly wonderful papa to his grandchildren as well.. I see a fisherman who loves the world in a way that is more awesomely gorgeous then one knew they could be. I see a stronger man than people even know. I see a warrior who has been hurt by words but papa I see a strange little smile when you believe in me. I see someone who never doubts me. I see someone who loves his family. I see someone who is so beautifully strong that I don’t know how you do it,…

So papa will you come over to the way of the left? Will you step out of your way of the right thinking and start seeing trees from above and seeing birds from afar and watching the moon through a photo lens and when you hear a sound start wondering what it is will you not get better but get more awesome will you live in a way that makes life seem like everyone is panda when they are talking about you… Will you think in the way of the left?

If you don’t accept.. I will fully understand some people can’t handle walking the way of the left, we sometimes forget we are in a race and we slow down and we don’t smell the roses because they have bees but instead we walk off the path and we find a strange bird and we start to talk to it. We follow yellow brick roads to nowhere. We enjoy barefeet and we enjoy simple things.. We don’t walk fast because we aren’t going anywhere we are just thinking.. Breathing living….. We aren’t in a fast pace world.. The way of the left is something you get throw into….. I don’t try fast I try strong. I don’t try hard I try soft.. I don’t give up.. I just get stronger…..

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Happy Fathers Day, Papa, may the world never be your stomping ground but instead be a place of peace and joy as everything goes fast remember the way of the left….. Isn’t waiting for you.. We are all off in our little worlds.. But you can join my little world… But don’t leave it…

I love you….

Shayweasel out..